After a kidnap has occurred family and loved ones go through a difficult phase. Fear of the unknown, fear of the future, worry about death and well-being of kidnapped person. Unfortunately, we the sympathisers tend to contribute with our quest for more information, subtle and direct accusation and our acts of concern and kindness.
So your child, brother, sister, father, mother, uncle, aunty, friend has been kidnapped, what can you do?
Feel your emotion
It’s alright to feel anger, fear and grief. However, you need to find the right ways to express your emotions to avoid transferred aggression. Take time to step back from the stress of the situation. This might be tough but you need to be deliberate otherwise you will get overwhelmed by your emotions and that of others. Little things like taking a walk, talking with a trusted person can be helpful.
Take charge
Get involved in activities that can help the kidnapped person. Yes, you are upset and grieving so channel all that emotion to something productive. Cooperate with security agencies and give them as much information as possible. Help to create awareness about the situation within your circle of influence: church, work, social media. You need to be strong and mentally ready to do this so you would need to eat and take care of yourself. Do not allow the situation make you forget to take care of yourself. You need to be fit for the task ahead.
Avoid the blame game
You might blame yourself for the situation. There will also be others who would be blaming you or having various opinions as regards the situation. Stay away from the blame game. It does not help you and you absolutely do not need negative energy around you now.
Your faith
Most times people draw strength from their faith and religion ordinarily. In this situation, your faith would give you some comfort as you navigate this trying phase. Studies have shown that people who pray more tend to have higher confidence levels in traumatic situations. Embrace the peace and solace derived here.
Now you know a bit more about kidnapping, here’s how you can reduce its likelihood:
Be proactive
Prevention is the key. Most times we are reactive to situations and this is not really effective. Since we are aware there is a problem, then the next thing should be how we can protect ourselves before anything happens. So we need to develop a plan of action and procedures for emergency and crisis situation most especially in schools and families. Training children on what to look out for, who to avoid, how to call attention to themselves if abducted and how to escape will keep them prepared You could also get devices that can keep track of your movement.
Situational awareness
Always be alert in your environment and know what is going on. Most times we are preys because we are not paying attention to suspicious movement around us. Wherever you find yourself whether lonely places or public spaces you need to be alert. Most times, we advise kids but we ourselves do not pay attention. We also need to be wary when strange people come into our environment.
Mind your appearance
Some of us make ourselves prey to these things unknowingly by our behaviour. Do not carry around large sums of money or flaunt flashy jewellery. When you leave work, take off your ID card as you do not want to inadvertently give out information. Avoid clothes with your name on it. Of course you should look good but apply moderation in all things.
Personal safety equipment
Invest in GPS enabled devices as they could pinpoint your location in unfavourable situations. There are different trends to suit your need or lifestyle. Improvise in your choice of safety tools, they can disarm your kidnapper e.g. sprays.
Self-defense knowledge might seem sort of extreme but it is handy. Remember your focus is to disarm your attacker enough to escape.
Last but not the least, if you realise you are being taken, make a show while you still have the chance. Scream, flail your arms, anything to get the attention of others to your situation.
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